Detecting lies and insincerity
Lie detection is not an exact science, or else our courts would have a much faster and more accurate system of administration of justice. However, there are some clues that we can pay attention to and keep a mental file on certain people and their behaviors. Observation is the key here, but don’t jump to conclusions based on a gesture or comment! You can get into a lot of trouble if you go around accusing people of lying, based on a single gesture. Look for synchronicity or lack of it. Also look for things out of the ordinary from that person’s usual communication style. This is called a “baseline” and it is your guide with someone familiar to you.
If we follow the 3V communication philosophy, we must look for signs of verbal, vocal and visual communication. Here are some suggested points to pay attention to to help you find insincerity.
Verbal cues: You might hear stuttering, for example, Uh … ah … uhm … well … etc. There may be an illogical order to a story, with “forgotten” details, or a story with no sense of beginning and end. Hear too many “verbose” details that you didn’t ask for, and ask yourself why they are voluntarily providing that particular information to you at the time. And the classic is listening to a story that sounds memorized and rehearsed.
Vocal signals: I heard a wavering and shaky voice. Hear an inconsistent tone with sharp, excited increases in tone. Listen at a fast speed, then with long pauses. Pay attention to an emotionless story when there should be some feeling, based on the words and the theme.
Visual cues: Face – blush or blush. Nose: touching or rubbing the side. (that is, it is not a natural scratch). Hands: closed palms, or hidden palms, or whole hands under the table or in pockets. (Note: open hands have traditionally meant “no weapons”, open communication, kindness, trust). He also rubs the back of his neck with his hands. Eyes: Although many believe that they should seek the lack of eye contact, modern research shows us that the opposite is true: people who try to deceive us / want us to believe them will make strong eye contact. They know that looking away gives the wrong impression, so they almost make up for it with wide eyes. However, you may look for quick glances back and forth, or someone looking up and to the right, which generally means “visually build something” and could be a sign that something is being made up; However, recent research challenges this concept that has been established since the 1970s. Now, new research tells us that the relationship between the eyes and cognitive behavior is not that predictable, so this is something you might want to try. First. Mouth: a smile especially with closed lips. Showing teeth is usually more genuine. Closed lips are a sign of a forced smile. Also hiding or covering the mouth is a non-verbal signal to “cover” the lie. An awkward laugh is also a sign of embarrassment, nervousness, or deception.
The lesson here is to pay attention to the people you do business with and try to observe more each day. Look for the synchronicity between the 3Vs and the chances of finding the truth are greater, in any situation. But remember, these things by themselves are not “smoking guns.” Follow up as you see fit, but stay calm, in case you mess up. Look for groups, not just a sign. Good luck detective!
